9 Quotes You Won’t Read In Dave Mustaine’s Autobiography
After yesterday’s news that Dave Mustaine’s autobiography will be released next year, we completely made up 10 quotes that you absolutely will not read when it’s released. Warning: contains silliness.
“Kudos to Metallica for writing The Black Album. I always knew that they’d top that early stuff anyway.”
“My biggest regret is that Kerry King didn’t stay in Megadeth. We went on this camping trip together once, Kerry King caught the biggest butterfly EVER that day! You should’ve seen it!”
“Turning water into wine? A Virgin birth? It’s bit far fetched, innit?”
“The truth is, I invited Rotting Christ to come out goat hunting and they declined. Fucking pussies.”
“I’ve always thought that Lars is a generous, giving guy who has a really low estimation of himself. I’d like to share a stage with him one day, maybe on ‘The Four Horsemen’. Sorry, I meant ‘Mechanix’, my mistake.”
“Chris Poland was such a square. Every night we’d be hanging out and partying and he’d just sit in his bunk reading Bukowski novels. Good one, Chris!”
“Marty Friedman was always listening to Cannibal Corpse and Obituary. Whatever we wanted to do, he always wanted to make it 10% heavier. I stamped on an ant once so he went out and shot a beaver to be more extreme. That was Marty!”
“If this ‘big four’ tour happens, I don’t care where we’d be on the bill. It’d just be a privilege to share the stage with all of those guys again.”
“The next Gigantour is going to be renamed ‘Satanfest’ and it’ll be us, Christ Inversion, The Lord Diabolus, Judas Iscariot, God Dethroned, Black Messiah and Lady Gaga.”
Read all about Dave Mustaine’s forthcoming autobiography here!
Read our review of Megadeth’s ‘Endgame’ and see how the album crashed the charts all around the world.
You voted for your favourite Megadeth album ever and you can get the results here!
Megadeth smashed their way through ‘Headcrusher’ on ‘Late Night With Jimmy Fallon’ on US TV last week and you can get the kick-ass footage here!
Kerry King told us that a ‘big four’ tour was a possibility for next summer, Megadeth frontman Dave Mustaine recently spoke out about the rumours on the tour and now Robert Trujillo has confirmed that Metallica are in talks to get a ‘big four’ tour together for next year. You can also check out the new Megadeth video for their bad-ass track, ‘Headcrusher’.
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king of heavy metal, all your comments ive seen on here r so fucking stupid.. its just a bit of fun geez.. lighten up dousche bag
i loled at the lady gaga one
“Besides the bass isn’t a difficult instrument to play. It’s one step up from the kazoo isn’t it?”
I’d pay to see Lady Gaga at Satanfest.
Top be honest as much as dave mustaine is a cock, its the likes of metal hammer that are keeping this metallica bs going…
Why not rename ye self to hello and start doing articles on jordan’s tits.
“Marty Friedman was always listening to Cannibal Corpse and Obituary. Whatever we wanted to do, he always wanted to make it 10% heavier. I stamped on an ant once so he went out and shot a beaver to be more extreme. That was Marty!” \M/
I agree, krang. Metal Hammer is a fucking celebrity site/magazine now.
Thank you for deleting “king of heavy metal” “post”.
many lols. megadeth is one of my fav bands of all time, and dave is my fav metal head of EVER, but poking fun never hurt.
i liked the Lady Gaga thing and the one about Marty Friedman, i like Dave a little more as a person now. how he was serious about that big four show.
People.
There’s more to musicians than just their music.
I mean, yes so Hammer and K******! are covering news stories NOT necesserilly associated with the actual music, but it’s on people who DO make music!
Some musicians are interesting outside the world of music anyways…
I lmfao at that Marty Friedman one. Hilarious!
Dave Mustaine is so insanely jealous of Metallica it’s embarrassing.
Megadeth are awsome Dave Mustaines a prick and he should open his eyes to the real world
Damn this is bullshit, good bullshit.
Dave Mustaine is such a child, really, the guy has the mentality of a 2 yr old. He is so jealous of metallica it is pathetic, geez, it is 2009, not 1983.
Isn’t Dave a born-again christian? LOL!
What about Dave Ellefson? Being a band with a guy such as Dave Mustaine for almost 20 years already makes him a hero!
!! — After yesterday’s news that Dave Mustaine’s autobiography will be released next year, we completely made up 10 quotes that you absolutely will not read when it’s released. Warning: contains silliness. — !!
Thought I should repost what it says at the top of the article. These are -not- real quotes from Mustaine — they’re still funny though.